‘The pain never leaves you’ – Lauren Goodger shares heartbreaking message of support to Kelsey Parker as she opens up about life after losing her own baby Lorena and the guilt, grief and silent healing that followed - suong

Kelsey has been in a relationship with tree surgeon Will since last year, going public with their romance last September - two years after she lost husband Tom to a brain tumour at the tender age of 33. And with the new couple now faced with one of life’s toughest battles, Lauren says leaning on one another as they grieve is vital.

“Losing a child can give a massive strain on the relationship - it can make or break you. It can break families but I really do hope that they stick together and get through it because they’re going to need each other. That’s one bit of advice I’d give to Kelsey, stick together and you’ll get through it together,” says Lauren, who adds that she would be open to talk with Kelsey if she ever wanted her support.

Like Kelsey, Lorena wasn’t Lauren’s first child - the star already sharing Larose, who turns four next month, with Charles Drury. And she says it’s being a mum that got her through the grief of losing a child, admitting that she threw all of her focus into Larose.

Phoenix was Kelsey's first child with new boyfriend Will Lindsay(Image: Phil Harris)

"I can completely feel Kelsey's pain and my heart goes out to her. Everyone deals with such a shocking loss differently - but the only way I got through those first terrible weeks was focusing on Larose, there was nothing else I did. Some people shut down and can't keep going but for me I had to. You can't just freeze because you still have to be a parent for your kids. In a way, it keeps you going."

She adds: “Larose is the reason I got through the first weeks and months, I threw myself into being the best mum I could be for her. I had double love for her and was the best mum in the world. Larose and Lorena were 11 months apart so I was still breastfeeding, she wasn’t even one yet, so I was still so busy being a mum to a baby at home,” she recalls.

Opening up on how she has broached her sister's death to Larose, she adds, “When she was young, I'd talk about Lorena. But now she’s getting older, I don’t talk about Lorena to her because I don’t want her to go through the grief I’ve been through when she’s too young to understand. I don’t want her to be in any pain. But I know Kelsey’s children are older, so it’s a difficult situation and one that everyone handles differently. Kelsey and Will will know what is right for them."

Sending her love to Kelsey and the family, Lauren says nothing can ever prepare you for returning home from the hospital without a baby in your arms. “We had everything ready and Larose’s pram ready to be used for Lorena, so Charles’ family hid all of that for me coming home from the hospital, so I didn’t have to see it or deal with it straight away.”

Phoenix was Kelsey's first child with new boyfriend Will Lindsay(Image: Jam Press)

While admitting she’s still ‘scarred’ from the loss, Lauren says she is finally in a place where she is reintegrating into work and life, explaining there’s no ‘right time’ - and that Kelsey shouldn't put any timeline on healing, either.

“It’s only in the last year that I’ve started to do things again and get back into work, I couldn’t before that. I was just depressed if I wasn’t being a mum, I had very strong boundaries which were part of my healing process. But now, I’m back on TOWIE which was a huge step for me, and I’ve had so much support from ITV.

"I’ve also been abroad to Portugal, before there was no way I could have gone on holiday when I’d lost my daughter. But it’s taken me three years to get to this point, there’s no timeline for healing.”

She adds, “I’m still scared of my own shadow sometimes and I still have anxiety, but that comes with the trauma. It's a process.”

Now, Lauren is even thinking about expanding her family again, something she couldn’t have dreamed of in her darkest days, after losing Lorena. “I would love to have a baby now. I don’t know when but I do really want another child.”

If you have been affected by this story, advice and support can be found at Sands (stillbirth and neonatal death charity). You can call them on 0808 164 3332 or email [email protected].If you have been affected by this story, advice and support can be found at childbereavementuk.org or you can call them on 0800 02 888 40.